Sometimes relationships just don’t work. No matter how hard you try and how much effort you put into them, sometimes two people just are not meant to last forever. When you reach the point in the relationship when you know this to be true, it is not the easiest truth to come to terms with. The investment that has been put into the relationship is difficult to release. The way things have always been whether good or bad, does not make it easy to let go.
There is a time when you do have to finally look at the situation and say, “Is this what is best for me? Is staying going to allow me to feel joy and follow my life path to its fullest? Is this relationship holding me back from being my best version?” If the answer is no to any of these, then you and your heart are ready. It doesn’t mean that you don’t love the other person. It doesn’t mean that you are a failure in any way because it didn’t work out. It just means that whatever you had to learn in order to grow with this person has come to an end.
It’s a hard reality to swallow. You never imagine on your wedding day that you would someday out grow the person you are with. It happens. It happens with all sorts of people in your life. Sometimes friends and relatives have to go. Sometimes boundaries and distances have to be made with people. What you don’t learn growing up many times is that this is just part of life. By allowing people who no longer fit in your life to stay, you are holding yourself back. You are allowing yourself to stay small.
We all grow at our own pace in all sense of the word. Growing up we grow at our own pace. We learn at our own pace and we grow spiritually at our own pace. When you start to grow spiritually and your spouse is not, it creates great conflict in the relationship. This is how people grow apart. It doesn’t make letting it go any easier, but it does make it a necessary thing for both people involved. You cannot grow at the pace you are meant to if you choose to slow down for the other person, and your partner many times will halt all abilities to grow because they feel like they will never catch up to you.
When this occurs everyone is being held back on their path and their potential. When children are involved, no matter how much you try to keep them in the dark about your relationship, they still know what is going on. The longer you stay in something that doesn’t work, the more negatively the children will be effected. The more they will learn patterns of behavior that will not serve them well in their lifetime. The longer you keep them in an environment that isn’t working, the longer it will take them to get back on track and back on their life path.
Letting go doesn’t have to be an ugly experience. It can still be done in a loving way. It will still be painful but in time the healing will begin, and you will be one step closer to your path of joy and fulfillment.
